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Spread the beef

"Only good things get into Shippam's." Okay. Scene: An English beef spread factory. A factory foreman peers into a huge vat, then shrugs and says ceremoniously: "I hereby proclaim this rat to be `good!'"

7 parts in 10 of this beef spread actually consists of beef. The maker seems to think that's a ratio worth bragging about. Makes one wonder about the other brands of British beef spread. These days, with Mad Cow Disease, maybe it's just as well if English beef spread were to contain no beef at all.

The label contains a number of other brags, but my favorite has to be "NO MECHANICALLY RECOVERED MEAT." (I don't know what the alternative is -- does one send gnomes in to scoop out the stuff?) Just goes to show that when it comes to food, those English folks just don't know what's good.

(Beefnapped by Carita)