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Those Unbelievable Believers:
The Blessed Sounds of
Incredible Christian Song Demos

Introduction
Treasures in Heaven
Hot Summer Nights
That's Peculiar!
I Am A Man; What Does That Mean?
Jesus Is About to "Rap" This Up
Oh Lord (Intro)
O Nightingale
Awr Gawd Izz An Awrsum Gawd
We Are the Champions (of God)
His Eye Is on the Sparrow
Christ in Me Is To Live
Chock Full of Love
Satan, You Lost, Lost, Lost
Soul Saved Tonight
Amazing Grace
We Want to Fish for Men
God, Give the Devil the Measles
Holy Jerusalem
Come Back, America!
The Safe Sex Is Just a Fantasy Rap
Want More of a Tangy Yangy Yang
Thank You, God

 

Totally how another crazy piece of religious music got started

Those Unbelievable Believers:
The Blessed Sounds of
Incredible Christian Song Demos

Brought to you by Deuce of Clubs

#19 — "Come Back, America!" (4:12)

From its first chords, "Come Back, America!" equals the earnestness of the most horrible Billy Joel song you can think of.

(Please stop thinking of Billy Joel songs. Are you some kind of masochist?)

The lead vocal is not by the Almighty Himself. Sorry. It is also not by Barry White. Even sorrier. I'm sure people have often confused the two of those famous voices, even more so now that they're both up there together with the angels. Probably singing backup, those angels, with that familiar, silky smoothness of the Love Unlimited Orchestra, only in heaven. So, you get what I'm saying here: even more unlimited. Un-unlimited, if you follow me.

No, this song kicks off probably much as Barry himself must have, with the voice of the Old Testament God, deeply—dare we say, sexily?—intoning one of his Old Testament promises to His Old Testament People, the Jews of ancient Israel.

If to no one else, it's nonetheless clear to the better sort of enlightened modern xtians—fundamentalist dispensationalists, duh!— that by God's Old Testament People, the Jews of ancient Israel, is really meant American Xtians. Duh! Sure, the Bible has some oblique symbolism, but you can't expect it to be so obvious about everything—without a sense of mystery, what's the reader's motivation for continuing to turn pages? Something has to have made the Bible a top marketplace performer for millenia.

"Come Back, America!" is less a top seller than a top soiler. Give it time, though. In its favor, when it isn't too busy copping its promises from the Jews of ancient Israel, it's running around copping its title from the book written and distributed for years at the amazing cover price of NO CHARGE by this song's thinkalike twin kook, longtime wannabe Arizona Governor, finally one-term Arizona Governor, and inevitably impeached Arizona Governor, Evan "Ev" Mecham. To this day, in Arizona thrift stores, Ev's book surpasses the ubiquitousness even of the Whipped Cream & Other Delights LP at the height of its thrift store ubiquitousness, the 1980s. (The first time I ever registered to vote, it was solely to cast a vote for Ev—purely for the entertainment value. And Ev did not disappoint.)

S I D E N O T E :

Merrill "The Lost Osmond" Osmond has a song with the chorus, "Come back America (America)."

(Right-click to download this song)

If my people, who are called by my name,
Will humble themselves and pray
Seek My face and turn from their wicked ways
Then will I hear from heaven
And forgive their sins
And I will heal their land

You once was lost
But God has set you free
Proclaiming God to be your king
And God has blessed you
And you know what you done
You have gone astray-ay-ay-ay-ay

[Chorus:]
Come back! Come back! Come back!
America
Come back to your first love
Come back! Come back! Come back!
America
You been away so long
Come back to your home
Come back to God

Crime, prostitution, drugs all over this land
Bombs being built every day
Is this America's future, livin' this way?
Wake up, before you go too far away-ay-ay-ay-ay

[Chorus]

Come back! Come back! Come back!
Come back to God
There is no other waaaaaaaaaaaay
Just come back! Come back to God
Come back! Come back! Come back! Come back!
Come back to God
From New York to L.A.
Just come back
Come back to God
Come back! Come back! Come back!
Come back! Come back!
Come back to God
Prepare ye the way
Just come back
Come back! Come back! Come back!
Come back to God
Come back! Come back! Come back!
Come back to God
Come back! Come back! Come back!

Treasures in Heaven (Intro)Hot Summer NightsThat's Peculiar!I Am A Man; What Does That Mean?Jesus Is About to "Rap" This UpOh Lord (Intro) O NightingaleAwr Gawd Izz An Awrsum GawdWe Are the Champions (of God)His Eye Is on the SparrowChrist in Me Is To LiveChock Full of LoveSatan, You Lost, Lost, LostSoul Saved TonightAmazing GraceWe Want to Fish for MenGod, Give the Devil the MeaslesHoly JerusalemCome Back, America!The Safe Sex Is Just a Fantasy RapWant More of a Tangy Yangy YangThank You, God

Totally how another crazy piece of religious music got started

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